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The Council of Losers of FENS Pathetic

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The Council of Losers of FENS Pathetic is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Blackheart Bobby with an iron fist, and remarkable for its closed borders, museums and concert halls, and deadly medical pandemics. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 10.263 billion FENS Patheticians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Port Sorrows. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 57.1%.

The frighteningly efficient FENS Pathetician economy, worth a remarkable 1,030 trillion dollars a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Furniture Restoration. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 100,376 dollars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 294,095 per year while the poor average 27,022, a ratio of 10.9 to 1.

Etiquette guides advise visitors to 'grovel gracefully', there is a heavy social stigma attached to e-cigarettes, exam halls are littered with used needles and empty pill bottles, and asking 'does my bum look big in this?' leads to 30 hours of self-esteem classes. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. FENS Pathetic's national animal is the leopard, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Poormeism.

FENS Pathetic is ranked 87,206^th in the world and 104^th in The Regected Realns for Lowest Crime Rates, with 67.57 law-abiding acts per hour.