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The Jingoistic States of Emergency Puppet 33

“Emergency”

Overview • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Jingoistic States of Emergency Puppet 33 is a gargantuan, efficient nation, remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, enslaved workforce, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 10.12 billion Emergency Puppet 33ians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Administration, Industry, and Education are also considered important, while International Aid isn't funded at all. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 38.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Emergency Puppet 33ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,267 trillion Golds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 125,213 Golds, with the richest citizens earning 5.8 times as much as the poorest.

Love is a precious butterfly to be crushed under diplomatic protocol, fixing attendance at women's matches is a matter of "when they go low, we go high... funding", the fattest folk in Emergency Puppet 33 look to be the happiest ones, and Scoutmasters debate whether luxury log cabins defeat the purpose of camping. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Emergency Puppet 33's national animal is the Black Widow, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Emergency Puppet 33 is ranked 126,268^th in the world and 369^th in Emergency Puppet for Lowest Crime Rates, with 63.09 law-abiding acts per hour.

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