Spotlight on:
The German Statistics of Elystradt |
“Ich bin tapfer und bin fromm”
Category: Father Knows Best State | ||
Civil Rights: Some |
Economy: Frightening |
Political Freedoms: Few |
Location: Union Mundial |
Regional Influence: Duckspeaker |
The German Statistics of Elystradt is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Auguste Viktoria I with an iron fist, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, ubiquitous missile silos, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 10.681 billion Elystrians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.
The medium-sized, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, although Education, Industry, and Administration are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tällin. The average income tax rate is 97.1%.
The frighteningly efficient Elystrian economy, worth a remarkable 2,720 trillion Elyks a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an amazing 254,729 Elyks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.
Libraries are replacing history books and classic novels with technical manuals and trades directories to match the nation's changing demands, gay hospital patients are labelled with a pink triangle to alert staff of their substandard blood, physics lessons mostly involve talking about emotional management techniques, and a stocking with a crooked seam or a tie without a full Windsor knot are grounds for instant dismissal. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Elystradt's national animal is the Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Church of Elystradt.
Elystradt is ranked 5,870th in the world and 11th in Union Mundial for Most Cultured, scoring 154 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in Elystradt, a stocking with a crooked seam or a tie without a full Windsor knot are grounds for instant dismissal.
- : Following new legislation in Elystradt, physics lessons mostly involve talking about emotional management techniques.
- : Following new legislation in Elystradt, gay hospital patients are labelled with a pink triangle to alert staff of their substandard blood.
- : Following new legislation in Elystradt, libraries are replacing history books and classic novels with technical manuals and trades directories to match the nation's changing demands.
- : Following new legislation in Elystradt, electricians spend more time in school than doctors.
- : Following new legislation in Elystradt, farm turkeys are given high doses of antidepressants to take their minds off the holiday season.
- : Following new legislation in Elystradt, the government is denying reports that criminals injected with experimental drugs have turned into monstrous supervillains.
- : Following new legislation in Elystradt, the poor are forced into bankruptcy by their energy bills.
- : Following new legislation in Elystradt, mandatory state-funded classes teach Libertarianism.
- : Following new legislation in Elystradt, the inside lane of every highway is for parked vehicles only.