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The Language-Learning Cult of Duolingonia

“You forgot to do your Spanish lesson...”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Rare

Location: Artificial Solar System

Regional Influence: Nipper

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

The Language-Learning Cult of Duolingonia is a massive, orderly nation, remarkable for its deadly medical pandemics, anti-smoking policies, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 2.663 billion Duolingonians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pittsburgh. The average income tax rate is 21.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Duolingonian economy, worth 461 trillion lingots a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Information Technology. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 173,180 lingots, with the richest citizens earning 5.1 times as much as the poorest.

Anti-vaxxers claim that injected children are prone to psychotic breaks when they see the 'Queen of Diamonds' playing card, the same 2663 social media bloggers always loudly and immediately agree with Leader's every word on Twitcher, the restriction that you must be over 1.1 metres tall to ride a carnotaurus has recently been waived, and newly-peaceful nations are forced to use assault rifles as farming tools due to a lack of funds for purchasing anything else. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Duolingonia's national animal is the green owl, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Duolingonia is ranked 258,254th in the world and 5,006th in Artificial Solar System for Healthiest Citizens, with 0.4 bananas ingested per day.

Top
1%
Fattest Citizens: 2,018thLargest Retail Industry: 2,184thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2,373rdTop
5%
Highest Unexpected Death Rate: 2,955thHighest Disposable Incomes: 3,360thMost Avoided: 3,800thLargest Mining Sector: 4,453rdLargest Insurance Industry: 5,156thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 5,455thMost Secular: 5,623rdMost Corrupt Governments: 5,794thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 8,661stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 10,602ndHighest Average Incomes: 10,710thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 10,729thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 11,993rdMost Patriotic: 12,450thLargest Black Market: 12,771stTop
10%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 13,034thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 13,122ndMost Conservative: 13,277thMost Efficient Economies: 13,822ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 14,455thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 17,654thMost Scientifically Advanced: 21,444thMost Subsidized Industry: 21,523rdHighest Poor Incomes: 23,239thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 25,193rdLargest Publishing Industry: 25,461st
Top
1%
Largest Retail Industry: 3rd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 4th in the regionFattest Citizens: 5th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 6th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 6th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 7th in the regionMost Avoided: 11th in the regionMost Secular: 11th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 11th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 16th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 29th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 32nd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 34th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 36th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 41st in the regionTop
5%
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 54th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 54th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 63rd in the regionRudest Citizens: 69th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 85th in the regionLargest Governments: 89th in the regionMost Patriotic: 90th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 90th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 99th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 104th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 128th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 131st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 144th in the regionMost Conservative: 150th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 190th in the regionLargest Black Market: 208th in the regionTop
10%
Lowest Crime Rates: 308th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 363rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 406th in the region

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