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The Federal Republic of Drunken Seal Islands is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by jizzmaster zero with an even hand, and renowned for its state-planned economy, infamous sell-swords, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate population of 20.304 billion Sealsmen are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bogania. The average income tax rate is 97.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Drunken Seal Islandsian economy, worth a remarkable 3,161 trillion Krangs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. Average income is an impressive 155,714 Krangs, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Voting is compulsory, small patches of desolate land across the world are part of Drunken Seal Islandsian sovereign territory, a niche industry catering to S&M enthusiasts has sprung up, and only 'organics' are permitted to be citizens. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Drunken Seal Islands's national animal is the Drop Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Boganism.

Drunken Seal Islands is ranked 216,805^th in the world and 3,490^th in The East Pacific for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 120.85 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.