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The Naked Brain of Ding Dong the Witch is Dead

“There IS such a thing as society.”

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The Naked Brain of Ding Dong the Witch is Dead is a gargantuan, cultured nation, notable for its state-planned economy, absence of drug laws, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, democratic, humorless population of 17.385 billion Dingdongers are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Social Policy. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mandela. The average income tax rate is 77.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but stagnant Dingdonger economy, worth 485 trillion common goods a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Cheese Exports, and Basket Weaving. Average income is 27,948 common goods, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The Supreme Court vehemently protects civil rights and the right to privacy, political parties are banned from advertising and receiving private donations, town nameplates frequently raise giggles from passing tourists, and motorists must pay to enter inner-cities during peak hours. Crime is totally unknown. Ding Dong the Witch is Dead's national animal is the human being, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Ding Dong the Witch is Dead is ranked 96,901^st in the world and 27^th in Mum for Lowest Crime Rates, with 66.24 law-abiding acts per hour.