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The Devastation of Cro Magnon

“Hit it With a Rock”

Category: Anarchy
Civil Rights:
Excessive
Economy:
All-Consuming
Political Freedoms:
Excessive

Location: the West Pacific

Regional Influence: Apprentice

OverviewFactbookPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

The Devastation of Cro Magnon is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by a council of Dons with a fair hand, and notable for its smutty television, rampant corporate plagiarism, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 14.232 billion Cro Mags live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

There is no government in the normal sense of the word; however, a small group of community-minded, liberal, outspoken individuals is effectively ruled by the Department of Industry, although Education is also considered important, while Environment and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Fire Pit. Income tax is unheard of.

The all-consuming Cro Magnon economy, worth a remarkable 1,285 trillion shiny stones a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is fairly diversified and led by the Soda Sales industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 90,351 shiny stones, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

The country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry, closed universities are currently being converted into MacDonald's restaurants, a survey of the nation's rivers and children has shown that pesticide levels are at an all-time regional high, and Humongo-Mart's Beef 'n Woolly Mammoth Lasagne is a hit. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Cro Magnon's national animal is the Woolly Mammoth, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Darkesianism.

Cro Magnon is ranked 204,192nd in the world and 5,812th in the West Pacific for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring -26.27 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.

Top
1%
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 576thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 601stHighest Crime Rates: 975thMost Influential: 1,048thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1,347thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,772ndHighest Drug Use: 1,925thFattest Citizens: 1,988thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,044thTop
5%
Most Armed: 2,324thLargest Gambling Industry: 2,618thMost Avoided: 3,069thMost Rebellious Youth: 3,105thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 4,694thLargest Retail Industry: 6,270thRudest Citizens: 6,308thHighest Disposable Incomes: 7,973rdLargest Mining Sector: 9,903rdTop
10%
Highest Economic Output: 12,821stMost Politically Free: 14,277thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 14,502ndLargest Populations: 15,490thNudest: 20,288th
Top
1%
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 11th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 11th in the regionMost Influential: 13th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 18th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 32nd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 33rd in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 35th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 41st in the regionFattest Citizens: 42nd in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 42nd in the regionMost Armed: 54th in the regionTop
5%
Most Avoided: 62nd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 64th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 89th in the regionMost Politically Free: 94th in the regionLargest Populations: 136th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 153rd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 164th in the regionRudest Citizens: 174th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 181st in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 205th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 206th in the regionNudest: 207th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Black Market: 322nd in the region

National Happenings

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 239 » Bran Astor, Bhang Bhang Duc, Kisovec, Recuecn, The Unified Missourtama States, Gastenburg, Wickedly evil people, Sensorland, DiscGolfLand, Psikuta, Divina Patriae, Atheist States of Philippines, Arnic, Condonohia, Pi Island, United Adaikes, 3kruimels, Kittenlicious, Twisted Duality, Free Radio States, New Belia, Cryland, Crazy Waters, Constantinopolisia, Fallgriffin, Greg Tucker, Pandaland III, Pandaland II, Liberillia, Mirchusko, Comia Noracon, Leukogeras, Bigstickistan, Probablynotverygoodistan, Wyndward, Atleska, Archonina, Sindria, Greynne, Quevilis, The Grandest Empire, Turacedran, Libterraria, The Fourth Redoubt, Dreamers for Hope, Glorious Existence, Rubberduckia, The Rega, Western End Them Son, Albyion Kingdom, and 189 others.Svanland, Pastern, Westwind, Nedtherland, Tropical Isles, Marina Nova, Granducato Toscana, Xupqeu, Desmosthenes and Burke, Oronia, Santos-Dominius, Marshalia, Win Mints, Fielure, Matism, Great Sheriffdom, Maria, Thyrall, New Democratic Republic of Russia, The Father-Land, Mercia Regnum, Lynier, The Shark Islands, Numpties, Triestine, Bodusse, Mathematania, The North American Assembly, The Technocratic Ideas, Avadon, Winter Aura, Lanaroce, Loegries, Fuentana, Sniki, The United Tribes of Bantai, My Anxiety, Imperial Eascalsh Ohavillbell, Neon Sweden, Dankinsted, Vasilism, Common Good, Shaktirajya, Ingentis Novus, Eritasia, Bova Ptaltand, The Undivided, Atopias, BoxcarJim, Ellcrys, Zenduria, Sik Levi, Robbinston, Dilber, Papercuts and Skittles, Ferroia, Resurgence City, Gryphonian Alliance, Meedvheyt, Q The Almighty, Surroosia, Turizion, Euarsia, The Northeastern Confederation, The Isle of Burgrass, Scationtanland, Kiensu, Amanohara, Futuo, Al-Amanah, Nieubasria, Craiolia, Arracrania, Antahbrantahstan, IndyCar Racing, Moriari, Av Libertas Vindex, Eienn, Plankstein, Hiems, Parinan, Holmani, Mediobogdum, Zoran, Estriacea, Fujai, Anuubis, The Antarctic Empires, Saransh, Inner Paniumati, Carvell, Volkason, Sniper Slayers, Fallen Iron Duke, Ahssn, Willow Gate, Rebal Elywuzzoia, Tijati, Gemiturkapistan, East Swedesia, Bonelandia, Bucals Kagotoaion, Democratic Peoples Freedonia, Eleftherios venizelos, KenyaAA, Altopan Gilange, El Facil, Irador, Grand Republic of the Sun, Vlobbania, Purcheah, Peartlee, Wasgonia, Aldesport, SV Equinox, Troodan, Glenbeigh, Starblazer, Region of Dwipantara, Ozis Isles, Hologaland, Thevinia, Pepinooo, Cumidava, Slawin Hall, San Diego Islands, Sirulinuck, Kalla, Emark, Arostatzka, Heslovasia, Impitystan, Reklim, Eskaton, Giovanniland, Dank Content, Nas Crustium, Navey Ode, Hamburg Neo, Baxterra, New Amerigo, Samueliebox, The Eastern Pennsylvanian State, Gracelantia, The Union of American Territories, Aeternis Taciti, Big Bertha, IXIMMXVIII, Fhaengshia, Pia Ottland, WilhemsHaven, Nakara Nation, Great Republic of Joland, United Alliance of the North, East Carelia, Qapaq Suyu, Bygone John, Marikeb, Ocheon, Sultanat of Turkistan, Salt Lake Mountain, Gottlands, Ordern Korat, Rikanhimel, Befiehl, The Royal Urchin, Metailuria, Cobra La, Demetrian, New Velka, Ostellan, Ignuei, E002, Armis Maxima, Meone, Pilonistan, Madarna, Francetown, Immortea, Professor Thomas, Yeetsralia, Neoteutonia, India and Bangladesh, Valocke, Greater Sor Osha Hoffle, Itrusca, Blakyria, The Vergville, and Veritalis.