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The Unsafe of Channel zero

“Stigmatized for life”

Category: Capitalizt
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Location: Heavy Metal Heaven

Regional Influence: Vassal


The Unsafe of Channel zero is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by FDSVD with an even hand, and remarkable for its public floggings, flagrant waste-dumping, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 26.673 billion Channel zeroans enjoy some of the most opulent lifestyles in the region, unless they are unemployed or working-class, in which case they are variously starving to death or crippled by easily preventable diseases.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Brussels. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Channel zeroan economy, worth a remarkable 5,470 trillion Black Fuels a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Soda Sales, Pizza Delivery, and Retail. Average income is an amazing 205,088 Black Fuels, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,566,254 per year while the poor average 7,346, a ratio of 213 to 1.

Cheap and tasteless vegetables flood the markets, the national sporting identity is represented by a talking burger and a singing smartphone, concussed Dashboard Devilball players cannot remember their lineup position, and science centers and state of the art laboratories are ubiquitous. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Channel zero's national animal is the Dashboard Devil, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Metal.

Channel zero is ranked 11,372nd in the world and 1st in Heavy Metal Heaven for Most Efficient Economies, scoring 100.06 on the Krugman-Greenspan Business Outlook Index.

Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 256thHighest Crime Rates: 404thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 589thMost Armed: 633rdMost Avoided: 766thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 944thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 953rdLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1,025thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,102ndGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 1,170thMost Rebellious Youth: 1,409thHighest Disposable Incomes: 1,514thLargest Insurance Industry: 1,555thFattest Citizens: 1,682ndHighest Economic Output: 2,143rdTop
Largest Gambling Industry: 2,803rdLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 3,418thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 4,067thLargest Populations: 4,381stRudest Citizens: 4,507thLargest Mining Sector: 4,854thMost Secular: 5,372ndHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 6,667thHighest Average Incomes: 6,929thLargest Retail Industry: 7,008thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 8,420thLargest Information Technology Sector: 10,390thMost Efficient Economies: 11,372ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 11,704thLargest Publishing Industry: 12,269thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 12,520thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 13,572ndTop
Smartest Citizens: 17,920thMost Cultured: 19,293rdLargest Black Market: 20,229thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 21,592ndHighest Drug Use: 23,075thMost Pro-Market: 24,907thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 25,444thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 26,718thMost Corrupt Governments: 27,350th
Most Armed: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 1st in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Secular: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the region

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