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The CookiEvee of CaveDweller

“Balance your Virtues”

Overview • Dispatches • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The CookiEvee of CaveDweller is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Cooki with a fair hand, and renowned for its disturbing lack of elderly people, pith helmet sales, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless, devout population of 13.835 billion Cooks are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is dominated by the Department of Industry, although Education, Administration, and Spirituality are also considered important, while Environment and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cooki. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 1.5%.

The frighteningly efficient CaveDwellerian economy, worth a remarkable 2,816 trillion Cookies a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Soda Sales, Gambling, and Information Technology. Average income is an amazing 203,562 Cookies, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,856,846 per year while the poor average 2,478, a ratio of 749 to 1.

Residents of newly dried out bays live in fear of leaky dikes, gossip magazines have been replaced by mask catalogs, the police have nothing to do with the increasing number of 'disappeared', and foreign ambassadors are accused of stealing CaveDwellerian jobs. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. CaveDweller's national animal is the Dog, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Maths.

CaveDweller is ranked 1,756^th in the world and 24^th in the Pacific for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 200,508.79 Standard Monetary Units.

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