Spotlight on:

The Black Holy Derivate of A Share of the JPMorgan Chase

“Greed is Good!”

Overview • Factbook • Policies • People • Government • Economy • Rank • Trend • Cards

The Black Holy Derivate of A Share of the JPMorgan Chase is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Cyril Sneer with a fair hand, and notable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, national health service, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, democratic, humorless population of 3.904 billion Americans enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The medium-sized, corrupt, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New York City. The average income tax rate is 95.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Share of the JPMorgan Chasean economy, worth a remarkable 1,878 trillion Gold Bars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 481,062 Gold Bars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Five-year-olds who refuse to line up on command get gold stars, education and welfare spending are on the rise, nobody thinks that the Godfather was bettered by Part 2, and war vets look after war animals. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. A Share of the JPMorgan Chase's national animal is the Vampire Cow Bald Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Belial - Lord of Depravity.

A Share of the JPMorgan Chase is ranked 291,536^th in the world and 27^th in United Earth Government for Lowest Crime Rates, with 20.89 law-abiding acts per hour.

Top
1%Top
5%Top
10%Top
5%Top
10%